Yes! There Is A Conspiracy! Be Careful!

My dear readers, I noticed a while ago that something was unusual but I didn’t pay too much attention on it.

But obviously, something is wrong.

Really wrong.

So of course, I started to pay more attention on the small details.

I do not know who is the villain. Or maybe it’s a group of villain? Or the government is behind that?

…Or worst, aliens are already here…

Here are the evidence.

Have you noticed that stairs are getting steeper.

Groceries are heavier.

And, everything is farther away.

Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long my street had become!

And, you know, people are less considerate now, especially the young ones.

They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they’re red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that she didn’t even recognize me! Can you believe that?

I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own refection ……… Well, REALLY NOW- even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!

Aliens or whoever are EVERYWHERE!

I told you! It’s a conspiracy!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast today!

You’re risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in front of them. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror. Beside… I have no idea why they are acting like that when I am driving…

The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse.

Do they think I actually believe the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they’re fooling? Do they think I am stupid?

I’d like to call up someone in authority to report what’s going on — but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they’ve printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in here!

I told you! It’s a conspiracy!

All I can do is pass along this warning: We are under attack!

Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful indignities.


What the government is doing?

What the ARMY is doing?



Mots clés Technorati : ,,

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